Testimonial~Mother God Changed My Life
By: Kelsey Bone
These past two days have shown me ALOT about myself & everyone around me. My soul has evolved so drastically in a short period of time that if I don't take a minute to ground myself & take a couple deep breaths, bring myself back into the present moment... i think I would be suffering some real intense anixety attacks! I'm honestly shocked that I’ve managed to walk myself through the hardest part of these energetic shift because I feel that by me riding this out is an end of a cycle.. This has left me with a whole new perspective that is now aligning with my higher self.
I grew up with drug/alcoholic parents who I didn't get much guidance from. The relationship with my earth mother wasn’t one of love & very toxic. She broke me before I was old enough to break myself. I went through a lot of abuse, mentally & physically. A memory that always comes up for me is when I was 6 or 7, I knew my mom n dad were up to something and it was bedtime but I was trying to fight my sleep. Sleep won, but when I woke up it was obviously like past midnight and I remember like running from room to room looking for my mom n dad crying. I couldn't find them but I guess I knew my granny's phone number and I called her and she came n got me.
But apparently this was something she always did, I just wasn’t aware. My granny told me that when I was a baby under 1yr old, my mother left me home.. alone in my crib and my granny said she just had a feeling & wanted to go check out my mom's place and when she did, she heard me crying in my crib for who knows how long. Me and my granny had a strong bond, a very strong one. When she passed away, it was also like a confirmation of some sort.
I wasn't living in Winnipeg anymore I was living in Regina with my bestfriend Des who I met in jail. This was my longest sentence and the longest I was locked up ( i got 5 & a half years/Drug trafficking/organized crime) and I did 2 years in jail ( 14 months in provential & 9 months federal ) and the time I was in jail was when my granny's health started deteriorating (& shes been diabetic her whole life) she had 2 strokes & open heart surgery & survived that.
So while I was in jail this was all happening to her and some nights i'd just cry. When I got out I stayed in Alberta and lived where I am currently for 1 year, and only went to visit her 2-3 times because the drive from Alberta to Manitoba is around 13 hrs and I had just gotten out of jail so I had nothing. I wanted to change my life and I knew that if i go back i wouldn't be able to.
After that 1 year, me and Des decided to move back to her hometown Regina, because that's where her kids were and she was trying change her life also but she has 3 children and me and her were together for 2 years at this time. She wanted me to meet her children because we were obviously in love and taking the next step in our relationship. One weekend I wanted to surprise my granny. We left that Friday night around midnight and I even remember how anxious I felt waiting to leave to Winnipeg. I don't know what it was but something was telling me to be there.
We got to Winnipeg around 5-6 am (Ii was heavy in my addiction to meth at this time so i wasn't tired) and I got to my granny's around 8-9 am. I remember her just sitting on the couch with the nurse that came over daily to help her. I ran and jumped on her as she yelled my name in surprise and we both hugged and cried for a couple of minutes. I visited for a bit but was in and out through out the weekend but I was still in heavy addiction to meth. She died the day I was supposed to leave which was Monday. I was staying at my uncle's place with my cousin Mark who I grew up with. I woke up out of nowhere Monday morning. I walked upstairs and went straight to the house phone and dialed my granny's number. She picked up and I said good morning, asked what she was doing & told her I'd be by there.
She told me that “we all jus ate breakfast and everyone went back to laydown, so I'm gonna go lay down, I'll see you in a bit my girl i love you." We use to do this thing where she always wanted me to hang up first... then I said “okay granny, I'm gonna wake Des up n we’ll get ready so we can visit for a hour before I go on the road. “ I said I love you and hung up & that was the last time I heard her voice. Everyone else got up and we were in my uncle's kitchen getting ready to leave, then my phone started ringing and I saw that it was my auntie Karla video calling me. I answered it and saw that she was crying & I instantly thought her and her husband were fighting or something cause she’d always call me crying for that reason. When I answered I rolled my eyes and said “omg what did he do “ then she shook her head and said “granny's gone .“
I instantly just jumped & screamed, threw my phone in the air and ran to the living room. I noticed Des, my cousin and his girlfriend didn't know what to do or say.. they let me cry for a bit and then we all went to my granny's place. When we got there, the ambulance was still there... my grandpa, mom, dad, and auntie were all outside while they were trying to revive her. She was laying on her living room floor, covered with a white sheet up to her neck. I layed on the floor with her pretty much the whole time hugging her, I even almost cried myself to sleep next to my granny's now dead body. They cautioned us and asked if we wanted to be in the room while they take her away and everyone said yes... watching them grab her from her hands and feet, placing her into a bag and zipping it up really did it for me. The whole time that was happening me and my baby brother were crying, screaming “ granny, no, not my granny “
The rest of my family told me that she waited for me, because when I wasn't there my auntie and papa told me she was sad and not happy. She didn't want to lose anymore fingers or toes. My auntie even said she use to wish she was dead, she was tired of suffering. I know that the anxious feeling I was feeling that Friday night I left was my higher self or her higher self telling me to go. The morning she passed away.. my higher self or her higher self woke me up out of my sleep early to talk to her, because that's the last conversation she had as everyone else went back to bed. I find dimes everyday everywhere and I know thats her. I only had one dream of her since she passed but I waited for like almost a year to dream of her and i still don't know why I don't dream of her more because I would like to but it is what it is
My grandparents raised me and I always looked at them as my heroes, especially my granny, she was my favorite person on this planet. She passed away in 2019 & my papa passed away 2020. My grandparents were together since the ages of 18(gran) & 16(papa) and when they passed they were 67(gran) & 65(papa). They were the glue to my family and when they passed away it literally broke us all.
Its sad for me to say that I'm the only one who made it out, not just the dysfunctional family I was born in, but my hometown (Winnipeg-northside) with all my cousins, family & childhood friends ( who have all died from suicide or drug overdose’s ). I got my mom, dad, auntie & baby brother who I am 17 years older than.
Each day I am now more heartful of everything around me as before this current energetic shift, I was able to bypass all of the energetic dysfunction that was in an around my environment. I am making changes to my daily routines in all ways by using my sense of humor, starting each and every day in different ways etc.
A quick example would be the other day when I took a shower. For years I've always washed my hair first, kept the door open etc, but this time I did things differently PLUS i didn't rush at all and i don't know what it is, but I have always been trying to rush. I took my time and instead of resisting the energies that were always uncomfortable for me, I surrendered and was able to maintain my center and not spin out. As I walked down to my room there was something I had never felt or even remember feeling before, from a shower ? My mindset was bliss & i was feeling just pure happiness that i didn't know i could get from a simple change in a shower routine.
So by me not being able to express my feelings or whats on my heart has literally had me for years pushing my feelings/thoughts down and making this a habit by covering them with everything & anything that didn't focus on just me. Which has only created a very intense/uncomfortable confusing state for my being! And now its like I am able to see all these invisible(energy) strings that have me (&everyone else) tangled in which are majority of all issues that are seeming very real & like my own!
The crazy part is.. nobody seems to notice or be aware of the energies that are behind the scenes & pulling the strings. Its like they're blind & cannot see or feel whats actually the cause thats taking place. We ALL should be aware of the energies that are behind closed doors but I know how much I would rather ignore these uncomfortable feelings.. by simply focusing on other things until we get bored and run out of distractions OR its simply just to obvious to ignore any longer!
Well how long did I think I could really run from myself for? Everyone, including myself... has been running from themselves. I been avoiding myself, lying, disrespecting my being. I had no love for my soul & didn't know how to love myself for SO SO SO SOOOO long...So if I were to (or anyone else) choose to put myself first.. it gets looked at like its wrong (far feched). So wrong that it seems like when you try put yourself first, its the wrong thing to do. And this isn't something I struggle with alone, its a world wide common issue (but everyone suffers in silent) that has been normalized through out the years and that makes it even harder to try explain the situation.. in order to help not only myself but everyone else who has reached this point in their life.
So much going on in & around you, feeling the imbalanced energies constantly around which only intensifies everything and shits just so fucking confusing.. but not? You don't even know where to start which can literally drive you crazy... unless you are able to find balance again and slowly start to figure it out! Anyway the rollarcoaster has finally come to a full stop, I can see clearly now and I have to make a decision, a very important one !
I can choose to jump back on and continue the crazy ride, continue to run&hide from myself and live in dysfunctional household OR I can quit being a bitch and face the issues I've avoided! Which hasn't done any good, its created a evil, ugly dysfunctional intense energetic life force sucking ball that is so uncomfortable to even want be around.
Sometimes it gets very loud and makes so many sounds at once and I can't even make sense of anything its saying... but now that I have some new perspectives and I can see it for what it really is.. another thing I'm aware of now is that this ugly, annoying energetic sucking ball wasn't created by JUST ME, I mean i definitely helped create it but now the real issue is that nobody else has really been aware (including me) of this toxic energy depleting ball thats been hiding behind closed doors for who knows how long?
I think the reason why its unknown to most and calling the shots is because each and every being including me are the ones who have all but unconsciously created it BUT lots are blind to it & even unaware to everyone involved yet they’ve helped with creating it!
All I know is that I've gotten many confirmations & synchronosities since my awakening started (2017). Especially 2020 & 2021. I stumbled across lovehaswon in 2020 and I started reading and couldn't stop because so much was making sense and giving me a feeling of like I found what i been missing.
Because I have been on a search for the truth and I've found 2 other people on youtube who I'm grateful for everyday, including lovehaswon (5DFULLDISCLOSURE). The reason I felt that love has won was the absolute truth is BEcause it was similar to the 2 other youtubers sharing similar content, the only difference was that Infinite waters (ralph smart) & young Pharaoh (aten nation) both shared the same understanding BUT just had different perspectives.
Lovehaswon (5DFULLDISCLOSURE) pretty much was everything they spoke on but just on a higher perspective, not only because GOD started the channel but how could I explain this? I'll say ralph was kinda like the one who was love & light an didn't speak with much aggression or like address the issues on the planet with any fear or speak on the negative side of things, young pharaoh is the opposite BUT he also taught me how to be a stronger person spiritually & physically.
Lovehaswon was the balance I needed and its so so crazy that it happened to be the one where I’ve found God and to be honest sometimes when a conversation would come up regarding god and religion etc, I'd feel like shy or even nervous to bring up the fact that actually God is a woman & also I've got her on skype.
I wish it was that easy, so depending on who I was talking to & how conscious they were would determine how much I shared with them and in what context. The only people I really shared the whole truth about God with was my 2 step daughters only because even though they have some programming, they’re children & they don't have all the programming us adults do. Its surreal when I first started connecting with them & buying the products ( which are 100% my top recommendations for health, mental, spiritual issues ) getting me and my family the surgeries etc. Its like it was perfect timing when I found lovehaswon, because I was broken.. mentally, spiritually & physically! But with the help of the colloidals, surgeries & support of everyone on the First Contact Ground Crew Team, I've successfully managed to start putting my pieces back, but obviously I'm putting each piece back differently.