My Home is Sophia...
"MY HOME IS SOPHIA, THE MAGDALENE..."
THE SPIRITUAL IS MY NORMAL
Eulogius Sinnespark (Br. Eulogius)
What has my own journey taught me? The most valuable and telling lesson is that my spiritual path cannot be divorced from what others would call the 'everyday' or the 'mundane.' There are those who have either explicitly or by inference suggested that I should wear two shirts, one for my day-to-day activities, and the other for the spiritual pursuits. But I am not only unwilling but utterly unable to do this. For myself, and I know it is the same for many others, the spiritual and the everyday are one and the same. There can be no divorce, no separation. Without a spiritual route, my road through the world of the mundane is non-existent, and it was always so. From my earliest memories, I have been acutely aware of that which I will call 'Other.' As a child I seemed always to be searching for something beyond myself, not because of a mere belief, but because my gut intuition told me of its reality. I sought this 'Other' within the Church, within many and varied religious traditions, but although I glimpsed something of it, it was not 'it.' Only as my life became punctuated by the Goddess, at certain times throughout my search, and as I began to join these dots together to arrive where I am now, only then did I really find Her.
What is She to me? Everything. She is Meaning. She is the Completion of my story. She is the energy I have felt since childhood, the power that I sensed and which made me feel out of place in this world for so long. Out of place precisely because that is exactly what I was, and which to a large extent I remain. I was not just a square peg in a round hole; I was a peg of no shape that would fit within what this world calls 'normality.' Because normality means conformity to creeds and dogmas and established behaviours that have absolutely no real or ultimate bearing upon who I am, or indeed, who any of us are at the core, beneath the flotsam of the many concepts we have woven about ourselves to create an identity. I continue to feel out of place, but now I am not a wanderer with no place to rest, no place to call home because of a sense of not belonging. My home is Sophia, the Magdalene, the Three-faced Goddess of beginningless time. She is the one within whom I reside, not just in those precious times before my sacred space, wreathed in incense, praying my Rosary by the glow of the candlelight, but in the 'normality' of washing dishes or driving the car, or picking the kids up from school.
The world weeps and wages war and whirls out of control because it is locked into an outlook and a frame of mind that warps our understanding of who we actually are as humans. Ideas that sever us from our Mother, that fracture the sacred union of Wisdom and Light within our souls to leave us orphaned and fearful. But in such a world, there is a realisation to be had and a voice to be heard. A voice that has been consigned to the backwaters of our collective story for too long and to our detriment as a species. And now many are hearing that Voice, crying out in the wilderness of the heart to make a way. To lay aside our egos and our pettiness and embrace Wisdom once again in all Her glory. To become fully human.